Okay, so this was an unexpected hurdle. And as many of you know, I don't take the unexpected too well. I found out about this two hours before he left, and laundry day isn't until tomorrow. Grrr! My first thought was how on earth am I going to make a baby without my husband ...um I not! My next thought was I hate being home alone, he's going to miss my dreaded 30th birthday and I'll miss him like crazy. My final thoughts were: this is a good paying job, I can cook all the fertility foods I want without guilt and TOTAL CONTROL of the TV. Lifetime, here I come!
After all the craziness of this morning I finally had some time to really think about some goals that I want to accomplish while my hubby is out of town. The first thing is to continue to stick to my diet and exercise program (even if it will just be easier to order Chinese and pizza) so that by the time he gets back I am ovulating. Usually I don't ovulate on my own, it is only when I am taking birth control pills or progesterone that I get a monthly period, but every time in the past that I have lost even the slightest bit of weight I am rewarded with a period. Yes, in my case PERIOD=REWARD, because I can't have a baby without ovulation. So maybe if I continue to stick to this diet and exercise we'll have a good chance of making a baby when he returns. You maybe wondering why I didn't have more than one period the last few times I lost some weight, well the truth is that PMS cravings got to me and I have no self control causing me to gain the weight back. Isn't it funny how it takes a month to lose 10lbs and only a week to put on 30. HA HA HA! This is me laughing....Right, so not funny. I will not give into the cravings this time, no sir! I am a determined mother-to-be and I refuse to let a Hershey's with Almond (my chocolate drug of choice) stand in my way. When I tell other women that I am happy when I do finally have a period, they look at me like I'm nuts and tell me I am so lucky. I don't feel lucky. Yes, I get all the same symptoms as everyone else, back aches, boob aches, and cramps. Sometimes I think mine our worse because they don't come very often, and they are trying to make up for all those months when I wasn't in misery. But the reason I am happy when it does come is because it makes me feel normal. Like a real woman. I know that I am a woman, but when you don't ovulate, or have kids and you have to have your chin waxed every other week that last thing you feel is feminine . I remember in high school feeling so embarrassed when even as a Senior I didn't get a period. Girls would ask me if I had a tampon or a pad, I never did. I would always lie and say it was because I never replaced it, when the truth was I never had one to begin with. I was happy when I finally started taking birth control and began to have a normal menstrual cycle. So to all you ovulating women out there BE GRATEFUL for your monthly visitor, because to me YOU are the lucky ones!!
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Praying for you these two weeks! Stay strong, you can do it!! I wish we still lived close by...I'd have you come stay with me for a couple days!! Praying that AF will be on her way soon!! Love to you, my friend!!
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